Dreamer

Public exam results have come.  Everyone were around me asking me to open the mark sheet of mm. I am logging in to my laptop and checking the site. The marks are neatly displayed with his Exam no / Name/Date of birth / School name and other details. One by one I am going through the subject and mark. At the end, it is Tamil and mm has scored 27 marks. Ooops. Everyone left me saying that he has failed in the exam.  I burst in to tears and started to cry.

This is one dream/nightmare I got last Sunday.  Why everything happens to me? mm is in his teen age and doing well in all his subjects except Tamil.  Recently he completed his Grade 2 Piano.  He also went to Chess Tournament held at Kothagiri and won 5 out of 10. He is an active Tennis player.  Still why this Tamil thing is haunting me like anything. Two more years, he will be in to his 10th Standard, is that the reason?

Once I went to a school run by my Co-Sister/Brother-in-law.  I was talking with her about the education and how the kids are doing. As the chat continues, she was saying that the parents force the kids to study. I was adding since the education decides the life of a kid, the parents are keen to make sure the kids read. But she said the attitude decides everything. She also added whatever be the force applied on the kid to study, it will only improve 5 to 10 marks.  Does the applied force on our little ones worth the 5 - 10 marks was her question..

My hearts understands this equation but my mind worries about the worst. Like any other parent, I too want my kids to study well and get settled in life nicely. Only time can heal my fears.  I will definitely read this blog again when my Mowgli is 25 years old to laugh at myself. It is gonna be interesting isn't it?

Current Comedian of our home - Nemo

nm forgot his lunch bag today and I had to go to his school to give him the bag. In the evening we had a discussion on the same.

Amma: Oi, why dint you take  your lunch bag?
nm: I am an innocent, it is you who forgot to give it to me.
Amma: Wait, I will also forget to give you the TV remote?
nm: Maa, what is the dinner today?

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Amma: Why did  you hit Anna?
nm: With all due respect, I am an innocent in the name of the Law.
Amma: AAAAaahh.(where in world, you are learning this???)

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nm and me were cracking the tamarind shells off the pulp. There was an understanding that whoever cracks more will be awarded 10 rupees.

Amma: Oi, you have cracked more tamarind that me.
nm: I am suppose to get more than 10 rupees..
Amma: Why.. why.. why?
nm: I competed with THE BEST and won. So I deserve more.
Amma: So how much is that 'more'?
nm: Atleast 100 folds..
Amma: Nee polzhachikuva da. (HR oda pilla illaya(Son of HR))

And after negotiation, he got 20 folds.. Naughty Kitten, my Sweet heart..

Karupatti Tales

Just wanted to pen this story which was told by mom long ago.  Today, am so happy and so proud to be a woman.  But it was not the same before 20 or 30 or 40 years. I used to long for a girl child while i got two boys and my mom used to long for a boy and she got 2 girls and 1 boy. We were talking about this gender related topic while my mom narrated this story to me and my sister.

It was during 1850s.. those were the time when a girl kid was born, it was not even shown to the mother or the father.  The tiny one was either killed with paddy seeds in the nose or with kalli paal. Just like, in the movie Karuthamma..

It was those days, when the delivery happens at home, in some portion of the home or in the cow shed. It was my GGGM who has come to her mother's home for her 3rd delivery.  GGGM got the girl baby delivered and was unconscious. Her mother took the baby and since it was a girl child ( 3rd in row) & had the umbilical cord around the neck(which is not good/life threatening for the maternal uncle), a big Karupatti was inserted into the tiny mouth so that the baby dies due to suffocation. The tiny new born child was left in the Thinnai outside the house in the cold night to die.

Karupatti :- Palm sugar ie Sugar patty from pannai maram/palm tree.

Thinnai :- The plank or bench outside the home for outsiders to sit.

When my GGGM woke up and searched for the baby, her mother had informed that the baby was left to die since it was a cord around the neck girl baby.  I could feel the chill in my spine when I heard those words... Womanhood is like a viruksha / tree is very vital and essential for our Ecosystem. And umbilical cord around the neck.. Nonsense.. What could make them understand things better.  It is tootoo late now. What does a women needs when she wakes up from the delivery? What will I do or feel when someone informs me such a nasty thing?  It should  be the times when people do not think about other's emotional situations or feelings...

With great distress and tear my GGGM ran to the kid it seems.  When she came to the thinnai to see the infant, the baby was with twinkling eyes and was sucking the Karupatti. She just took the baby and ran to her husband to safeguard the baby.. With this our GGGM didn't stop and her next deliveries happened at her in-laws place it seems. She should be a strong woman. Happy happy days for them.

It is already written whether our life is going to be a mere mess or a fabulous history. Lets do our part to participate in this journey. See, the tiny girl baby became the tap root of our forth coming family tree. And here I am the 5th generation woman, penning the story.. We all are set out to do what we are meant for, no matter how hard anyone try to stop it, isn't it???

Mom & Dad Europe trip - (Actually, the topic should be => Without Mom & Dad for 15 teary days)

This blog will not say anything about my parent's trip but my ability to handle the situations alone during the trip days ;)

On Sep 15, 2018, My Mom and Dad started their Europe trip by 5 am in the morning and I became the Lady in charge of my house.

Since my kids were having the quarterly exams, I requested leave for 10 days. And my gracious supervisor had granted the same (God bless him). I let out a word that I will work on the GSDs from home (Loose lips sinks ships, isn't it?).

Once my parents left, I became the polite, well behaved, responsible, lady of the home. I neatly swept the room, mopped, washed the dishes and the home was a heaven on the first day.  Kids went to music class, read for some time and then we three watched some movie and a show.. though it was a pleasant day as night started, I started to worry.  I was the only elder in the whole building itself.. Oops.. I am even scared of my own SHADOW & now I have to handle 15 such nights..

Next day, I washed all the vessels and neatly arranged everything.. The house was so neat and I dint feel like cleaning it again. We had food, had a chat, fought and watched a movie and went to sleep.. Again started the dreadful night and I was finding it very difficult to sleep.. I was even scared to come to the hall. Ooops 14 more nights.

Next day, my kids started to the school and I was able to get some time for myself.  I started with my office work.  Oops some 35 tickets in queue.. When I was half done with the tickets, it was 12 pm and mm rang the calling bell.. Ooops I forgot my break fast.. gave him some snacks and started with cooking. Thus my time was running in front of me to handle all the tasks which were thrown at me.. We are in 3rd floor without lift facility, so I had to go down for water, vegetables, groceries and everything else too.

Next day, my dearest friends G and S came to my home for a chit chat. It was good to have them with me. We talked for a very long time and I made chapathis, paneer gravy, sambhar and rice for lunch. Prepared Mysore Pak but it was a mess.  But I packed and gave them to finish it off ;)

Next day, my dear sissy came home to give me company along with her tiny T.  I was calling her daily to say, that I am not sleeping, since it was scary alone. Our home become bright again with people around.  My bro too came to check on me.  I am a person who is always surrounded by people and especially without MOM/DAD, naan romba paavam..

Various next days came and I was handling things with difficulty.  Those are manageable situations but I dint come across for a long long time. My mom, sure is an angel..

I had to attend the calls, open the door for the visitors, attend my dad's customers, listen to the complaints from our tenants, collect rent, water the plant, clean the house, cook food, wash/dry the clothes, Sweep the stairs, Mop the floor, Wash the dish, shop for vegetables and other essential items.  I had to run with my night gown to attend the fire accident that happened due to short circuit (Kashtakaalam/Distress situation) I was going out of breathe. Most importantly make my kids learn for their Quarterly exams(My God). Previously I was talking too much on the home maintenance. I was blabbering to mom that i will turn the home upside down to make it look neat and tidy(Big mouth comedian I am). Though I found some time for myself, it was not enough for me.  I started thinking about MM which was worse.  As days passed, I became rude, uncivilised, reckless and a mere monster as seen by my kids(during the study time).. The GSD tickets, which I agreed to take care haunted me. I dint like the me.. I was scared to the core. I wanted my mom/dad to return soon and to save me from the damage I was causing myself..

On September 30th around 4 pm, my parents returned from their trip.. Wow what a blissful moment. I was the happiest person in the world on that day. I can sleep without any fear the whole night. My parents were happy and they enjoyed the trip. All of us are @ peace now..

Though those were the difficult days for me, I was able to manage it. It gave me time to think about the reality.  I think I should list them here and remember it through my life.

My Understanding during the 15 days.

1. My Parents = My Confidence
2. Raising a child is not easy.
3. There is more in life than work.
4. When you are not there, people will replace you at office.
5. Money cannot buy many things
6. Days are longer when you wait for someone whom you love.
7. Nothing is really lost until moms can't find it. (it is for me too ;))

And talking about other achievements during the 15 days

1. Watched few movies without any disturbance not even advertisements

2. Found time to talk with myself and with my kids(Sub chaltha hey)

3. Lost few pounds. (Later gained the same within a few weeks due to the Swizz chocolates ;))

My Sep 2018 is exciting isn't it??

Today is full of possiblity

My Monster Mowgli and Naughty Nemo are doing good.  mm doing his 6th STD and nm in his 3rd STD.  Have put both of them in Tution, Music and Swimming classes.. Both are doing good in Swimming, Tution.. But they do not have THAT interest in Music. I am saying this because they skip lot of classes :(  ie whenever I do not remind them that they have their classes.. Previously Nemo was taking Guitar classes but I had to push him hard even to attend the class and he often complained that it hurts in the finger.  So shifted to Keyboard classes for him. I am trying to buy them a Keyboard.  Lets see.. Both of them are weak in Tamil (our mother tongue) Our friends/relatives just suggest us to take alternative language so that it is easy for them.  BUT I WANT THEM TO LEARN OUR LANGUAGE.. I am trying to find a home tutor to teach them Tamil.. Lets see how it goes..

For me, at work I had asked for a change in role and got in to an extended TM support role. So vigorous training is going on for us. The team is going live only during July 1st week.  So enjoying workless days for the past 1 month.


On Personal front, I have put on lot of weight so trying to get in to a routine to shed those excess weight. At present I am 65 KG.  mm has also put on some weight. I have to accommodate him too in my weight loss program. Will update on the routine and weight loss in my next blog..  Lets see.. And SIL has come to India with her son and daughter. And my kids are eager to visit them.. nm and SIL's son are getting along well(Same age group).. And my poor mm is left alone :( without anyone to give him company similar in his age.. My MIL has developed some spinal dislocation and is on traction.  Other than that, everything is going good and expecting the same in the future too..

My Seat

This is were I spend most of my time everyday..
Though the work is tedious, I will squeeze few seconds to relax my eyes by seeing these colours a little away from the desktop. Those flowers were given by my brother :)  Normally I will carry flowers from home, which blooms in our roof top ;) But most of the flowers are from my Pappa, my sweet Darling 63 year old, my patti.  Once I told her that I have Baba and Pillayar idol at my office and every time I visit her, she gives me flowers for the idol. Do you think she gives it for the idol? Naaahhh..

Why everyone likes my place:

Fragrance is awesome.
Colours are pleasant to eyes.
Blooms relaxes mind.
It feels good.

Some colleagues visit my place, just to check on the type of the flower, I am displaying..My colleagues are inspired and are bringing flowers adding to the already existing colour and fragrance.

Do you see the Money plant peeking at the left? It is 4 yr old and still smiles at me everyday. I could still remember the day I took it to office.  My whole team came to see my plant. Most of them wanted for them too.  So i gave them the plants along with the jar of water. Yes we grow them in water pots. It is said (myth) that this plant has to be stolen and has to be raised like a kid. I used to talk with my plant everyday.  I also advice it to my fellow colleagues.  It works as a vent when I am in pressured situation. While I go to my colleagues place, I will definitely check whether the pot is with water.

The best part of having a money plant is, we don't have to water the plant everyday. A single pot of water lasts for a month providing free oxygen for us in our bay.  Nice isn't it?

Just Another day in my life, but when I talk about my boys, it is a special day...

Time flew very fast.  My mighty Mowgli is in 5th Standard and my naughty Nemo is in 2nd Standard.  God bless them. Have put both of them in a tuition as I am reaching home very late now-a-days.  I personally do not like to put the kids in tuition. But without me at home, my kids spend most of their time in TV/Mobile and other games ruining their eyes and mood. Last month my Sissy found a good teacher and both my boys are going there to learn their portions after school.  Other than that Mowgli is taking Piano lessons while Nemo is busy with his Guitar classes.  Life definitely is very sweet with my boys.

Bro is getting married.

Today early morning 4 AM, I was sleeping and my mobile rang.  It was my brother. He walked out few months ago from our house. He was calling me to open the door. I told him to call my mom as I was in my in-laws place. how could I sleep after that call???  He is in love with a girl and is getting married today. He is trying very hard to invite us all to his wedding.. But my mom and dad are so stubborn that they don't even want us to attend the marriage. They are still living in their ages. All I could do was to bless him whole heartedly.  My FIL and MIL attended his marriage and showed me few pics from his marriage. Hope everything goes well for him in the coming days.

Video chat with SIL:
Today being Vinayaga Chathurthi, we went to my in-laws  place a day before and spent the whole day there.  After a very long time, did a video chat with my Sister-in-law in California.  She was so excited to see my Mowgli and Nemo tall and all grown.. She asked Mowgli to stand near me and my MIL to check on his height. Mowgli was too eager to talk with her and was blabbering whatever was coming in his mouth.  Mostly he was showing all his teeth to her and her little ones.  She has a boy (an year younger to Nemo) and a gal an year old(Angel she is..). She was saying that she will visit India next year.   The Video chat went on nicely.

Hectic life:
Coming to my official life, it is going very hectic. Have taken reports as a career change.  My god, we are being squeezed to the core. I have taken a day off tmr to attend my personal chores. When I go on Wednesday, I will be bombarded with tasks.  Let me face them on Wednesday ;)...

Will come back soon..